Hey, Wanna See Mitch REALLY Cry?

 As awful a human being as he is, in so many ways, our Dear Senate Majority Leader actually appears to possess an emotional trigger. Early last month (December, 2020), the Senate bade a fond fare-thee-well to Tennessee's senior senator, Lamar Alexander, who opted for retirement at age 80.

Dear Leader Addison Mitchell McConnell Jr., (that's what momma actually named him), appeared to be on the precipice of a good ol' man-cry, as he stood at the podium honoring his loyal chum, Mr. Alexander, one of his most dependable Republican yes-dudes. It seemed as if those optical waterworks were about to burst forth at any moment, inundating the entire Senate chamber. Here's the video, for your viewing pleasure.

Believe it or not, this wistful event wasn't Mournful Mitch's first-ever Senate-session blubber-fest. Back in 2017, Dear Leader and His Merry Band launched their seventy-somethingth attempt to suffocate The Affordable Care Act, a.k.a., Obamacare. However, three GOP senators bravely crossed the aisle and saved the day: Susan Collins from Maine, Alaska's Lisa Murkowski, and, in dramatic fashion, the late Arizona Senator John McCain, having just been released from the hospital where he was being treated for terminal cancer.

Launching into a funerial scold-a-thon, Dear Leader seemed to be at wit's end: Were we witnessing Mournful Mitch or the scolding old Mangy Mitch? Judge for yourself.

In any event, Obamacare survived. Despite its warts, it still serves as a lifeline for over 20 million souls. On the other hand, the Senate chamber came this/close to suffering the watery consequences of a Marathon McConnell Man-cry.

Tomorrow, January 5, 2021 will be a memorable day, whatever the outcome. The Good Burghers of Georgia are faced with the noble task of empowering the United States Senate. Dear Leader Mitch's future as The Grim Reaper is on the line. The Democrats have fielded two very capable candidates, Rev. Raphael Warnock and Jon Ossoff. In contrast, the Republican incumbents are a duo of self-serving, Trump-loving grifters, who've personally profited from this deadly pandemic. 

If The Good Reverend and Mr. Ossoff prevail, Dear Leader Mitch will end up, alas, as "Just Another Senator."  He'll waterlog the chamber with his copious tears. 

I'd strongly suggest that FEMA remain on standby for a massive cleanup effort. 

NOTE: For further details regarding Mr. McConnell's 2017 weep-a-thon, feel free to eyeball the post from 9/25/2017 titled Trumpcare 3.0? Seriously?

More Posts Coming Up The Pike

 Over the past year, my brain's been tragically fallow. I've made concrete plans to vacuum it out and install some fresh brain cells.  If all goes well, posts will resume soon.

A Few Meandering Thoughts in the Wake of Extended Posting Droughts

Have you ever felt so overwhelmed and exhausted by the state of affairs that your creative stream became reduced to a mere piddle? If so, I can relate.

The Presidency Is Not A Toy!

Looks like The Bathtub Admiral is at it again! (For relevance, please eyeball my post dated 9/14/16: Young Master Donald, The Bathtub Admiral).

Only now, now that he's the honest-to-Gawd, rotten'-tootin' Commander in Chief, The No-Longer-So-Young Master Donald has ratcheted up the tension considerably. Against all sagely advice from relative grownups like National Security Advisor General HR McMaster and Secretary of State Rex Tillerson, as well as numerous other career military officials and diplomats, the Tangerine Terror decided to walk away from the nuclear accord with Iran: All by himself!

And whom do you think he anoints as his nation's security go-to guy?  This dude:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLE-cMbm0sk --- and not to be overlooked, his alter ego: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFCTIIPuACMh

Yosemite John Bolton may appear just as cartoonish as the Warner Brothers character, but his presence on the international stage is no laughing matter. Actually, Cartoon Character Yosemite Sam, despite his bluster, can be kinda cuddly if he's so inclined. He's been known to shoot gumdrops instead of bullets. In contrast, there's nothing even remotely lovable about Cartoon Character Yosemite John Bolton and his  relentless obsession with things that go boom!

From the outset of his campaign, His Royal Orangeness has insisted that he doesn't want war. Yet he anoints as his national defense advisor the most incendiary creature in the whole universe: Military force is Yosemite John's one and only antidote for whatever ails the geopolitical sphere. He was one of the most raucous cheerleaders in support of our tragic misadventure in Iraq! 

So what's The No-Longer-So-Young Master Donald's game? Is he trying to be "good cop" versus Yosemite John's "bad cop?" Who knows what transpires within the cobwebbed caverns of his fevered mind! 

Everything he says and does seems to be off-the-cuff and unbelievably cavalier, considering possible consequences. Millions can live, or millions might die! It may depend on the number of cheeseburgers and Diet Cokes that he wolfed down the previous evening. Kinda reminds me of a scene from Charlie Chaplin's iconic film, The Great Dictator. Check it out. (Links aren't available, but video clips can be viewed on YouTube. Just key in "The Great Dictator: Globe Scene.")


A wee bit of advice to Master Trump might be appropriate at this juncture:  The presidency is not a toy! Neither is the world!

Mitch the Turtle? I Dunno!

Ever since Mitch McConnell has achieved political fame/infamy, a lot of folks have been cracking wise regarding his perceived facial resemblance to our shell-endowed animal friend known as the turtle. Many refer to him as "McTurtle."

Me? I don't get off on it.  First of all, the guy has very minimal control over his appearance, unlike our Tangerine Toddler-In-Chief. For the record, McConnell once appeared as a guest of Stephen Colbert on his late-night TV gig. The host showed him the photo of a tortoise with his guest's head superimposed over the creature's shell. The senator responded with a big ol' shit-eating grin. "I love it," he cooed. As awful a human being as McConnell may be, he can, apparently take a joke, unlike the thin-skinned Reverse Raccoon residing at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Here's my second reason for not being real stoked on the McConnell/McTurtle stuff.  It's insulting to turtles!  They're harmless, gentle, environmentally simpatico critters.

Even the ones that snap!

Speaking of Power Grabs

Now that the Democrats have recaptured a majority of the House, they're determined to restore humane values to that august body. For starters, they've introduced as their very first measure in the 116th Congress, a bill intended as a joint resolution with the Senate; it's been dubbed the For the People Act, otherwise known as House Resolution 1 (HR 1). 

Among its provisions are the following:
---Purging of voter rolls is deemed illegal.
---It requires independent redistricting commissions, doing away with gerrymandering.
---Automatic voter registration becomes standard and universal.
Additionally, there are campaign spending limits, and a mandate requiring disclosure of campaign donors. Oh, not to be forgotten, Election Day would be declared a national holiday.

A solid House majority is widely expected to approve it. The Senate? Well, that's another kettle o' fish! Here's Senate Majority Commissar Addison Mitchell McConnell, Jr. (yep, that's really his name), at his disdainfully harrumphing best: https://www.nytimes.com/2019/01/31/us/politics/election-day-holiday-mcconnell.html

"One more federal holiday! Just what we need!" he huffed, referring to HR1 as a "Democrat power grab." A power grab? Is this the same Addison Mitchell McConnell, Jr., who refused to even hold hearings for Judge Merrick Garland, President Obama's Supreme Court nominee? (It must be, unless he has an evil twin. Uh, never mind!). His excuse? Wellll, Obama's a lame-duck president. It's an election year and his last year in office. Of course he couldn't cite any sort of legal or constitutional prohibition, because there ain't any!  He actually tried to cite historic precedents, but upon being challenged by an astute TV journalist, he pitched a hissy-fit. Behold the clip: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wg781xOBLT4

Kudos to Face the Nation's John Dickerson. Unless I'm wrong, Master Addison Mitchell McConnell, Jr. conveniently forgot that recently-retired Justice Anthony Kennedy was nominated by a lame-duck president named Ronald Reagan. Admittedly, one could get a li'l nit-picky over the fact that he chose Kennedy on November 11, 1987, a month-and-a-half prior to the election year. But he was sworn in on February 18, 1988.

It should be duly noted that the Democrats comprised a solid majority of the Senate that year: 55-45.  Senate Majority Leader Robert Byrd made no attempt --- none! --- to obstruct Senate hearings for President Reagan's nominee. In fact, the mostly Democratic Senate approved the Republican President's choice without a single nay! 97-zip! 

So, let's talk power grabs! If Master McConnell's blatantly political monkey-shines --- the denial of Obama's nominee, followed by the ramrod tactics used to advance The Orange Caudillo's court picks --- weren't power grabs, then Mike Pence is a commie.

Back to HR 1, the For the People Act! Master Addison Mitchell McConnell, Jr. insists on calling it a "Democrat power grab."  That's his opinion. He might be partially right. As far as I'm concerned, it's a democratIC power grab. (Note the lower-case "d.")

A very righteous one!

Update:  On March 8th, HR 1, otherwise known as The For the People Act, sailed through the House 234-193.  Every Democrat voted yea, Republicans uniformly gave it thumbs down. 

But for now, that's as far as it goes. Even before the vote was cast, Dear Senate Majority Leader Addison Mitchell McConnell, Jr. has declared that he won't bring it to the floor for a vote. When asked why not, he harrumphed, "Because I get to decide what we vote on!"   During a press conference two days prior to the House vote, he stated his reason for opposing the bill: "It's a bill designed to make it more likely for the Democrats to win more often." <gasp>

The good news? According to recent polls, Addison Mitchell McConnell Jr.'s approval rating amongst his Kentucky homies stands at an abysmal 30%. He's up for re-election in 2020. So maybe a strong, assertive Democrat can unseat him.

In the meantime, we're stuck with him. So there'll be NO electoral fairness, NO campaign finance reform, and NO end to gerrymandering. Why? Because Addison Mitchell McConnell, Jr. SAYS SO!

Down Goes the Orange Caudillo, Up Comes Bobblehead Mike

Holy Kremlin! Could it be?

  The curtain may be about to descend on Trump's acid reign over the US of A. Just the other day, The New York Times released a barn-burner of a journalistic piece. (Dateline: Friday, January 11th.)  Apparently, His Orangeness's unceremonious eighty-sixing of FBI director James Comey, triggered an ongoing investigation focused on possible collusion between Trump's coterie and Moscow --- which could possibly ensnare The Reverse Raccoon, himself. Anyway, here's a link to the article; you be the judge. https://www.nytimes.com/2019/01/11/us/politics/fbi-trump-russia-inquiry.html   (click anywhere on this address: the link will appear below)

If this scenario actually unfolds, guess who takes charge of the Oval Office!  Wherever Mr. Trump might be, standing close by is what, at first blush, might appear to be a hard-wired lamppost with a burnt-out bulb. However, whenever the Chief Executive twitches his lips, The Lamppost can be seen bobbling his globe in affirmation. At that moment, it becomes evident that The Lamppost, despite its burnt-out bulb, has characteristics that are vaguely human. It's none other than Mike Pence! Bobblehead Mike!

Bobblehead dolls in the image of the Vice President are available online. I'm not about to invest in one, however; they're not cheap. But I can still make use of my warped imagination: no charge!

Envision one holding forth on a bookshelf or coffee table. Plop one of those li'l gyrating hula dolls down beside it; I mean perilously close! Bear in mind that the real Mike Pence cannot ever be alone in the same room with a woman other than his wife <gasp>! (Incidentally, he addresses his beloved spouse as "Mother.") Yet here he is, sharing the same, immediate peace of real estate with a grass-skirted cutie! Mother would be very, very angry!

Just in case that scenario seems too risque or offensive, I have a tamer alternative proposal. Just mount the Mike Pence bobblehead on the rear window ledge inside any sedan, facing aft, of course. This would enable Mike Pence to do what he does best. Looking backwards!